TAG.

Ohgawd Harry.

Hello loves, so i'm not doing a daily update today, life is pretty boring rn, BUT i might do a collective one tomorrow? i'm just doing this tag thing cos i got tagged on tumblr, which you SHOULD check out.

MY TUMBLAAA 

• 1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now? 

Cos i don't know what the fuck to do. 

• 2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone? 

• 3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?

Nope, cos i'm just here like.

• 4: Do you find it easy to trust others?

#truestory.

• 5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?

• 6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

Christopher. Or Danielle on her first drinking night.

• 7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

• 8: Are you close with your dad?

Yeah, i'm his princess. BUT, shit happened & we're currently having a cold war. But i still love him.

• 9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

If my dog counts as someone, then yeah. we had a banged up time. 

• 10: What are you listening to?

#np Always Be Together by Little Mix.

• 11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?

Water.

• 12. Do you like hickeys?

Depends who gives them. 

This, ANYTME. ANYWHERE.

• 13: What time do you go to bed?

i am nocturnal. I sleep only cos i don't want testicles under my eyes.

• 14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

Myself. & Harry Styles for taking this long to fall in love with me.

• 15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?

YES.

• 16: Do you always answer your texts?

No. Only if it's important, it's my parents, or i like you.

• 17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

I ask myself that same question every day.

If that makes sense.

• 18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

2 days ago.

• 19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?

Meet Le sunshine, Danielle.

• 20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

Him.

• 21: Is anyone else in the room with you?

Nope.

• 22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?

• 23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?

Wow. that hit hard. Ha.

Yes, most definitely. 4 Months ago i was probably the happiest i've ever been.

• 24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

Yes. The same person imma keep referring to as, 'Him'.

• 25: In the past week, have you cried?

Honestly, yeah. 

• 26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

White.

• 27: Do people ever call you by your last name?

Yeah, Danielle. HA.

• 28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?

Yup, Him.

• 29: Do you have a best friend?

I have 3. 2 i see all the time, 1 i really miss & hopes he finds the time to stop being so distant & get the fuck back into my life soon.

• 30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

A bit, considering i ever see that guy again though.

• 31: Who was your last call from?

My Babe, Avril.

• 32: Are you mad at anyone?

Myself, for not being enough for Him.

• 33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

Yeah.

• 34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

23. 

• 35: How many more days until your birthday?

155 days.

• 36: Do you have any summer plans yet?

Work then start poly. 

BUT, imma go to the beach. most definitely the beach.

• 37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?

2. Chris & PS.

• 38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

1 friend knows everything. Another knows almost everything. Another, doesn't have the time to listen.

• 39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?

Yes. 

• 40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

YES. OHMYGAWD.

• 41: Do you think age matters in relationships?

No, age is really just a number. It's how 2 people feel for each other that really matters.

• 42: Are you available?

Yes but i'm just waiting for Harry to come on tour to asia. Then i'll work my master plan on him.

• 43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?

It just did. so none? but if you counted the past year, One. Him.

• 44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

Belly Button.

• 45: Do you believe exes can be friends?

Some. Not all, some. The ones you just can't afford to loose.

• 46: Do you regret anything?

Many things.

• 47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?

Him. & why the fuck is chris not replying cos we're supposed to meet up for a puff.

• 48: Did you ever lose a best friend?

Yes.

• 49: Was your last kiss a mistake?

No, i will remember it forever.

• 50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

Wow, that's a good question. But cos he's happier without me. as simple as that.

• 51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

Nope. 

• 52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

Nope, which sucks, cos i'd like to see that guy again.

• 53: What was the last thing you ate?

Fried Eggs.

• 54: Did you get any compliments today?

Nope. never do.

• 55: Where are you going on your next vacation?

Lol. Idk.

• 56: Do you own anything from other countries?

Harry from uk, but he's in NYC now. He's mine. 

• 57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?

Girls. but i've about the same number of guy friends.

• 58: Where have you lived most of your life?

Singapore, my home?

• 59: When was the last time you took a long drive?

I don't drive, but the longest would probably be when i decided to take a bus from my house to east coast park.

• 60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

Yup. fun as shit.

• 61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?

Nope, would like to try it sometime though.

• 62: Who do you text the most?

HAHA, no one in particular. like No one ever texts me for no reason, they either need something or wanna meet me for something.

• 63: What was the last movie you saw?

Breaking Dawn Part 2.

• 64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

Don't have one. Unless you include Harry, & my answer would be his undying love for me.

• 65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2010?

1. homygawd.

• 66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

Nope. Older. like 6 years older.

• 67: Do you curse around your parents?

Yup. 

• 68: Are you happy with where you live?

Yes. its small, but it's cosy & it's my home.

• 69: Do you collect anything?

Besides my feels for Harry Styles, nope.

• 70: What’s your favourite colour?

Any colour that makes me look good.

• 71: Does the last song you listened to remind you of anyone?

Yes. Him. 

• 72: Has anyone ever cheated on you?

Yes. Ha. Good luck to his current girlfriend. Hope she's satisfying his sexual needs, or he might just cheat again. or not. #justsaying. i mean it could just be that i wasn't good enough.

• 73: What are your plans for tomorrow?

• 74: Do you have siblings over the age of twenty-one?

Only child.

• 75: Does your last ex have a job?

Nope, useless schmuck.

• 76: What would you do if you found out your most recent ex was in a relationship?

Er, he is & when i did, i was upset, but then the first thing that came outta my mouth was, "oh good fucking luck to her."

• 77: Where is your cellphone?

Next to me.

• 78: What colour is your cellphone?

White.

• 79: What did you dream of last night?

Nothing that i can remember.

• 80: Are you atheist?

Whut?

• 81: Will you change your name when you get married?

Yeah, unless his names is like swadiwoodipong. & don't be all 'LOL there's no such name', fuck you, there is. He was in my primary school.

• 82: Are you ready for autumn weather?

Already in it now. Don't like the rain though. unless i'm home & snuggled in bed.

• 83: Have you had any big storms recently?

Yup, almost every day.

• 84: What kind of bottoms are you wearing? 

Blue FBTs.

OKAYYY. that was one fucking long tag. I TAG EVERYONE WHO SEES THIS TO DO IT IF YOU WANT TO. & I'm out. will do a proper update tomorrow. Bye loves! x.

Better alone.

#Np Oath- Cher Lloyd Ft. Becky G.
Whuttup lovely people of the internet. Soo here's a daily update for the past 3 days.

Tuesday i stayed home the entire day watching videos, tumblring & i even watched twilight, like yeah. i was that bored. At atound 7 i headed to Ikea with my parents. went to see some furniture for my room. Need to do some serious shit to my room. Had awesome ikea dinner for 3. Then headed home.

Was feeling a lil shitty, so i asked chris out for a puff. Met him at like 10 & only went home around 2. Talked a lot & basically just caught up with him cos i honestly missed him a lot. Besides Danielle, he's the only other person who has always been there for me. Through everything. literally everything. he sent me home & went off to ton with another friend.

Yesterday was another stay home day. stayed home the entire afternoon till about 5 when i headed out to plaza sing to catch breaking dawn part 2 with Jasmine. It was the shizzzzzz. heh, like iw ould totall watch it again. Sooo gonna buy the disc. I can stillr emember watching twilight with 6E clique back in primary 6, & now i just watched the final one & i've graduated sec 4. it's crazyyyyyy. Time flies. After the movie, we walked around town for a bit then headed home.

Check out the trailer yoh. If you haven't watched it, go watch it! I swear you won't regret it. this is probably my favourite of all the films!

Today was meant to be another stay home day, BUT my babe Avril asked me out, how to say no?! missed her soooo much.

So i got dressed & headed down to vivo to fetch her from work. & i also went to La Senza to check with the people if i got the job & they asked me to go to the La Senza HQ tomorrow. so finger crossed that i get the job!

We walked around vivo for a bit, & i WAS NOT supposed to buy anything today, BUT being the material bij i am, i bought something. BUT i got a navy blue skater skirt form Forever 21, which i have been looking for for forever now! & it was only $27. plus i had a 10% discount & it even came with an oxblood Belt. Mega awesome deal! Avril also got a supa pretty bejewelled bustier top for her birthday/countdown! she looks soooo hot in it!

Then we headed down to town. Went to the usuals, cine, scape, 313 then headed to orchard central  saw this GORGE black studded sling bag. it was supaaaa nice & the sales girls were all, you have to get it. you should totally get it. Omgggg. I put it down & decided to get it on saturday. Then we headed to MIYOC to look around but found nothing:( walked back down to the shop selling that bag(it's located directly at the foot of the steps to MIYOC) & i saw the same bag hanging on a mannequin, BUT IN FUCKING ROYAL BLUE. I swear it was love at first sight. i fell in love. i tried it on & avril was like, "i buy for you for christmas ah!?" I jumped on her & hugged her so tight screaming i swear the sales girls were laughing at me. AHHHHH i absolutely love it & love her. Sooooo happy i got it.

They have great packaging!

TADAH!

that dent was self inflicted:( i'm a klutz. but it's still gorgreousssss.

Ooooh, aaaah. It's sooo shiny you can see my reflection.

They have this $5 off every itme thing till 31st Decemeber. The items are very reasonably priced, & above that you get a $5 off your purchase. Which is crazyy! So head down to tag style @ orchard central now. Or shop online with them! You get the $5 off online too! 

CLICK HERE TO SHOP TAGSTYLE ONLINE.

After that we went to walk around 313 for a bit then headed to scape again then home. I hate going out with Avril. cos i will DEFINITELY buy something. but surprisingly, every time we go out, the stuff i buy, i actually really love! Woop. But i also love going out with her, cos i've missed her so much!

My Dearest Babe Avril Nah Yu Ting.

Alsooo, check out Daniel James Howell's videos on youtube He's one hell of a  funny-ass youtuber. Lovelovelove his videos. & he's a brit. JFC, can the world stop having so many awsome brit guys. I mean there are the boys of One Direction, There's Jack & Finn, there's Tom Daley, Freddie Stroma & now Dan. asdfghjkl. STAWP IT.

Dan's Youtube Channel.
Jack's Youtube Channel. (which Finn is often Ft. in)

His latest video.

& then there's Jack & Finn's latest Video.

& BAM. A JACK, FINN & DAN COLLAB VIDEO.

This also really funny! Jack & Finn Ft. Tyler Oakley.

Okay that's all for today's post! Thanks for reading & sorry for not updating as often as promised. Love you all for still being my awesome readers.

Died. lol. kbye.

This is for the broken hearted.

Hey, i'm sorry for not blogging. shit has just been really bad these few days. well nothing was ever really going okay.. it just got a hell worse. So i just don't have have the mood to blog & all.. but this blog post i meant specially for someone.

Disclaimer: this is a very personal & ranty post about my story.one that would not necessarily benefit you in any way but i'm gonna talk about it anyway. Cos after all it is MY blog. If you're not interested or couldn't give 2 fucks, you can leave now & wait one or 2 days for another post. Thanks.

So there is was this guy that i met. If you're really close to me, you'd know who i was talking about. How we met was kinda funny. cos if you've read my last post before i went on hiatus for prelim & o's  you'd know how. Well basically i had this stupid crush on some guy at a cafe. after that shit i went on some 'zone-everyone-outta-my-life' phase. i literally zoned everyone out. my friends, my family. everyone. i would go to the library everyday & study alone. life was kinda unbearable. Then after about a month of that crazy fucked up phase, i decided to turn to the people closest to me. i turned to Chris & danielle. i asked them out, cos some how they were the only people who could really ever make me feel better.

Okay to summarise the series of fortunate & not so fortunate events. about 4 months ago, i met a guy who i thought was just another jerk. i refused to let myself feel anything for him. but we grew close & yeah, i fell. hard.

Let me just say this before all you judgemental peeps be all "who asked you to be so stupid to fall for his sweet talk" LOL. firstly, i did not,cos he did not sweet talk me. he didn't have to. secondly, you think i don't beat myself up about it enough already? you think i don't constantly think "what would've it been like if i didn't fall for him?" NO. you don't know balls. so you either sit yo ass down & read through this entire post or stfu, take your judgemental bitch of an attitude, stick it somewhere else & fuck the hell off.

as cliché as this sounds, Yes, he was different. Cos the truth is, every guy is different. Not one love story is the same. Not one heartbreak is the same. everyone has a story & i think everyone should respect that.

Well he was a great guy i guess, he was tall, funny & smart. he was my kinda guy. He studied hard, he knew what he wanted in life, he treasured his family & friends, he had a future. He was the kinda guy i would imagine spending every day with. He didn't tell me i was beautiful. He made me feel beautiful. He didnt tell me i wasn't fat. He carried me & would be like " if you're fat, i wouldn't be able to craddle you." He even hit off with my parents. Just being around him made me feel happy. it gave me this sense of comfort & warmth.

Jeez i could go on all day long about how he could light up my world like nobody else. but i won't. What happened was that i let myself for one second think that he wouldn't hurt me. i let my guard down & i let him tear down my walls. the walls i so carefully built around my heart to prevent it form getting broken again. he creeped his way into my life, into my mind & into my heart he made me rely on him, he made me need him. then he left. no explanations, no reasons, no goodbyes. just one second he was there & the next he was gone. I figured it was cos i was really just another toy to him so i let it go.

 I just wanted to post this for all you broken hearted people out there. I just wanted to let you know that if you think you're alone in this, you're wrong. you are not & never will be alone. Being alone & feeling lonely is totally different. often we feel lonely but the fact is we aren't alone. What we should do is not to zone people out, but to let yourself be a lil reliant on others for once. I know what i'm like when i'm broken. I zone people out & i self destruct. But it's not good. One should never keep & bottle up all these emotions to themselves.

I was having some serious h2h with chris yesterday & he let me read this. His screen was fucked up so i couldn't read it but forwarded the whole thing to myself instead. but here it is.

This is for the broken hearted. I know how you feel. Empty, betrayed, and no happiness whatsoever. You don't want to laugh, because you know it's not going to help, but you don't want to cry, because it will just make you feel worse. You feel like your heart is falling apart, but not only that, but you know soon your life is going to feel like it's falling apart too. You don't think it will ever end, and no matter what this person has done to you, it feels impossible to stop loving them. And everyone wonders why if they have hurt you so much, then why do you still love them. That's the confusing part, you don't know why, you just do, and the people who hurt you the most, and normally the ones you love the most. And then, after a few weeks, you finally feel a sense of relief, like you're getting happy again, but you know inside that you're just going into denial. And after a few more weeks, you're back to where you were an empty soul and teary eyes. You thought you got over them, but really, you just stopped showing it. And you can't help but to show it again. It leaves deep scars on your heart that are there forever. And no one understands how you feel, and how deep you are hurt, no matter who they are, because it hasn't happened to them And even if it has, every broken heart is different. They don't know the true pain you feel and carry each and everyday now, so you learn that basically you are alone with all this. And the feeling starts to overwhelm you, and suddenly you just break down, right there, because you know you've had enough, the tears just instantly start flowing, and you're to the point where you don't care who see's. Because you've spent so many nights lying awake in bed, and so many days being haunted by the scars and fear of rejection. And in the midst of all these tears, you know that its not helping any, and it's not going to bring them back, if you ever even had them in the first place. After about a million tears have been cried, you finally pull yourself back together and keep going. Your throat starts to clench and your eyes burn with the tears you are trying to hold back. Everyone says, "It will be okay…” But you know it won't. And that’s the truth, it won’t. And you look back on all of the hurt you had from this, and you realize that people are horrible. You're still hurt, but you've learned to hide it so that everyone thinks you are okay. So now every time you see this person, you know you still love them, and you feel a slight tingle in your heart yearning for them to love you, screaming out, but for some reason they don't hear it. And then you sit back and wonder how one person could have caused all of this...

I haven't even read it. i just forwarded it to myself. cos i can't bring myself to. it reminds me too much of him. Hell everything reminds me of him...
That was for all the broken hearts out there. You're not alone. i feel you.

This, this is for you... if you're reading this.

Hey you. You're probably never gonna see this.. But who gives a fuck. I wanna type this out cos there's just no way to say it & not cry a goddamn river. I just wanted to tell you that I really missed you.. I've missed you for so long now. I just know that it doesn't matter to you anymore. But I just wanted you to know that since you, there hasn't been another guy that has been able to make me feel quite like the way you've made me feel.. You make me feel special. You make me feel beautiful. Despite what everyone else says & think. despite what I think, you make me feel otherwise. You make me believe that for one second, maybe I'm gonna be okay.. Maybe my life might have a happy ending & that maybe for once I'll be the lucky girl who actually gets the guy. Not that fat friend who just sits on the sidelines watching while her friends get all the good guys. You made me believe that I was worth something. You gave my life value when I thought I would never see value in my life again. You made me smile when no one else could. You broke down my walls I carefully built to keep guys out. You tore those walls down & got straight to my heart. You creeped your way in. You made me fall unconditionally & irrevocably in love with you. You were my one in 7 billion. Still are. I know this is stupid cos it probably will never be made known to you. & even if you did know that you wouldn't give a fuck.. But that's okay.. I mean it. It's okay. I mean of course I wanna be able to be your one in 7 billion. But I'm just not. I'm not as pretty as her, not as smart as her, not a skinny as her, not as perfect as her. Hell I'm not even anywhere near perfect. So I totally understand how you ended up leaving me when you realized how I could never be good enough of a replacement for her.. I just wished you either gave me a warning or said bye before you decided to completely disappear off the the face of my world. You should've at least said bye.. It would've hurt me so much. But it would at least let me get the closure I needed to move on. Now I just can't. I can't bring myself to forget. I mean it's not like I didn't try. Trust me, I've tried. Trying to zone out all those thoughts & feelings I had for you. But none ever worked. I still think of you every single day. It sucks cos it pains me to see you or talk to you, but i can't get you outta my head. I want you back. I want my dumb buddy back. I wanna laugh like the way you made me laugh. I wanna smile like the way I always did when you were around. I wanna feel happy again. I want you. I love you.. But it's cos I love you that I have to let go.. It kills me to have to accept that I will never get you back. Accept that you're so over me. Accept that I will never be good enough for you. But I have to.. & accept all that I will. Cause I wanna be happy for you. & I will be. I honestly hope you get her back. If you do get her back. I would be more than happy for you. Cos I know how much you love her, & that's how I feel about you now. & if the happiness you would feel when you get her back is that of the happiness I would feel if I get you back, then I really do hope you her back. Cos I want you to be happy. With or without me. You're a great guy, one of the best I've ever met.. & I know all that shiz you said to me probably meant nothing & you probably already said those to other girls & I'm stupid as shit for believing them.. But a part of me is still hoping that at least a part of all that was true & that maybe you meant a bit of it.. But even if you didn't. I see the goodness In you. I've always seen it. From the moment that you said I wasn't fat. To the point when you lifted your shirt to me when I was crying. To when you made me feel beautiful for the first time in my life. To the part when you were there to make me smile by just being around.. I know deep down, beneath all that swinging, you're the guy I fell in love with. I hope one day that guy comes back. He doesn't need to be my guy. Just you. The guy I knew would always be there for me. The guy who could light up my world with his smile. The guy who I am & will always be in love with. I love you. There I said it. No more hiding or being in denial. I love you. 

Well that's it for today's post.. i'm sorry i promise ill post something a lil less melodramatic tomorrow.

Flea & Shopping.

#Np DNA-Little Mix.
Hello Cupcakes! I'm back with a post! & soooo imma just jump straight to it alright:)

Look what Jasmine did with my alphabet soup on saturday night while i was blogging. HAHA.

Thee HARRY one's like the wrong side up but i'm lazy as fuck to rotate it & re-upload it. so fuck that. HAHA

----

So sunday, as most of y'all know, was the flea. & it was great! I mean besides the stupid rain & annoying cheapo people. Ha. like some people can get really cheapo i swear. like some good quality stuff that we buy for like $30+ you wanna buy it from us at like below 5? & what's worst, there was this chinese lady who i'm pretty damn sure can afford it for a good $10, wanted it at $1 ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WOMAN?! JFC, 1 DOLLAR? BIJ YOU CRAY CRAY.

BUT on the plus side, We sold shit loadsa stuff which was great! Woopie, it was a success! *victory dance. Heh. && we got to take pictures with the Lovely KayKay & I found the balls in me to go take a picture with Eric. Happy girl. Oh & do check out their blogs! x.

KayKay's Blog.

Eric's Blog.

Oh & i saw Asheera who's one of the lovely girls who also got selected to talk to Harry Styles by the Hotfm91.3 thing! Missed her.

(sorry for the horrible quality. Was using my front camera & the lighting was bad!:()

Overall it was a nice experience, but i doubt i'd be doing that kinda thing again for awhile. i mean i cannot simply subject myself to selling those items i got for like for more than 10/20 dollars for 5$ & then even at $1. It's utterly heartbreaking.

Cab-ed back with Jasmine & had pathetic maggimee, cos we were simply too tired to carry the unsold stuff & find some place to eat. butbut it was pretty damn good.

Caught Eclipse on TV too. Can't wait for wednesday, gonna catch Breaking Dawn Part 2 with Jasmine. Yaye.

Pictures taken with my two lovely girls.

-----

Today was shopping day with Jasmine & Lynette. We went to FEP first to go see blogshops. Finally got my Checkered top from wonderstellar. Hola. Been looking for a red & navy blue chex for the longest time!

Then we walked about but nothing really caught our eye so we took a bus down to MIYOC. Jasmine couldn't find a nice leather jacket, which ashincans was suppose to have, but it didn't come out in MIYOC yet, so she's gonna order it online. If you haven't been to MIYOC check it out at either Orchard Central or JCube!

i decided to humour myself & check The shop next to MIYOC where i previously got my denim top to see if they had the black studded shorts i previously wanted but didn't get. GUESS WHAT?! THEY DID. omf, i was sooooo happy. like holy. so i got it. woop.

After that we headed to plaza sing to buy the tickets for breaking dawn on wednesday & walk around for a bit. got Gongcha too. Jasmine did some accessories shopping & we crapped in some cool new stationary shops. LOL. was bored so yeah. walked over to Cathay for dinner at Astons & guess what? LOLOL, they were under renovation.

Bullshit. So we bus-ed down to bugis+ for astons cos we were craving it like asdfghjkl.
They also gave me the wrong side dish, i oredered the mac & cheese but they gave me mash potatoes. BUT cool thing was instead of changing, they just gave me the mac & cheese without taking back the mashed potatoes. But didn't end up eating it cos it tasted like the shiz 711 used to sell. ew. But we got our Aston's anyway so happyending. hahahaha.

My Black Pepper Chicken. 

Yummeh Mac & cheese.

My Mashed potato is happy cos we didn't eat it.  LOLOL.

After dinner we walked around for a bit then headed home cos were aching everywhere from the flea the previous day. But overall had a great day out shopping with my babes.
Supaaaa happy with my hauls of the day. Heh. although i didn't get the bag i was looking for, i managed to order it online. so yaye for online shopping.

HAUL. 

You versatile piece of clothing.

Black studded shorts. 

Sooooooo. i camwhored. yeah. it is my blog right. bite me.

Couldn't help it. my Boyfriend wanted to be in my picture sooooo yeah. 

LOL.

That's all for today loves. Really tired & my neck,shoulders arms are all aching really badly. might do a topic post tomorrow cos it's stay home tuesday for tolentino. But thanks for reading, love you! x