Insecure.

Hello cupcakes. i'm here with a topic post. soo, today i just wanna talk about insecurities. this, among a lot of other problems is by far the most recurring & common issue many people(especially girls) experience. Idk, if you're some self-sufficient arrogant person or think you're perfect then this clearly isn't the blog post for you, so i suggest you either exit this page or by all means read on, but do not be all, 'bitch please, i'm perfect" all up on my ass.

So there're three kinds insecure people out there. the genuinely insecure, but try & deny it kind of insecure.
These kind of people tend to coop up at home & give reasons like i'm lazy, i'm not feeling it today & so on, simply avoiding having to step outta the house or simply to be seen by anyone especially by strangers who could potentially judge them.

Or they could bother going out but don't voice out how they feel about how insecure they are. They don't deny or whatsoever, they just avoid the topic. They don't purposely rant on about how they hate their body & all. They see skinnier girls or prettier girls but stfu about it, but deep down all they want is to feel that pretty or feel that skinny. but STFU about it. These are the more laidback, still uptight, but defo more laidback.

Next, there's the kind that are genuinely insecure & don't fail to fucking let the whole world know about it. They are like all 'OMGWTFASDFGHJKL i hate my thighs, i wanna be skinnier, i'm so ugly" Haha, don't feel bad, cos hunny unfortunately, i fall in this category. like OMG. when i'm with a friend,we spend half the time staring at cute guys & the other half staring at girls hotter than us(which is about 99% of the female population) & be all "i wish i was herrrrrrrrrr" Sista i feel yo pain. trust meh, i feel yo pain.


Lastly there's the type that are completely not insecure but fucking act as if they are. this is the fucked up category, & yano what else falls under this fucked up category? girls who are so damn ass skinny, but call themselves fat. bitches that already look good but go on & on about how ugly they think they look. Like bitch really? Really? STFU. These 2 types of fucked up people should just stick it somewhere else cos seriously, girls like me that are legit feeling insecure for all the right reasons, are sick and tired of Listeining to skinny ass hos be bitching bout being insecure for all the wrong reasons.

& WHY exactly do people feel insecure exactly? why? HAHA, i especially hate when boys ask you all annoyed "why the fuck are you so insecure?" oh idk, maybe COS YOUR DOUCHEBAG MALE SPECIES KEEP CALLING US FAT & UGLY OR CONSTANTLY COMPARE US WITH GIRLS THAT ARE OBVIOUSLY HOTTER THAN US & DO IT IN-FUCKING-FRONT OF US? or idk it could be just cos we choose to be insecure on our own. yeah.

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Well hun, i feel you. 

Okay so this is where shit gets personal. I've also been a victim of such shit. like ofc it's not as bad as demi lovato & many other girls who have decided to end their lives(obviously i mean who else is typing this rn)  well yeah, so i've got comments saying i'm fat & especially hairy like on my legs & arms., So yeah, these two kinda hurt the most cos firstly, the weight, i have tried to loose it before & i did, but thanks to dane. after i stopped dance in april cos of O's, i have been putting back on the weight, which obiously sucks.. & i can't help it, simply cos i don't have time anymore to dance & do all the workout stuff we do during dance prac, like i've tried going to the gym & all, but one can only do so much. Secondly is my legs & arms, god i remember this guy telling me "you should like go on a diet then go waxing" wow that hit so hard it's still etched deeply in my mind & i can recite it word for word, so yeah once i went waxing thanks to avril & i swear i actually felt good about my legs cos they were like hairless. like it felt really good. but let's be honest, i don't have the money to go do that every few months cos it's gonna cost me sooooo much(about $50/wax) so yeah. i have problems too. & i admit i feel insecure as shit about it. haha. i mean i'm only human.

Okay since i got all that out then let's move on to the importance of today's post.
Being insecure is really common as i've probably already mentioned a gajillion times, but some people fight it. This is completely normal. BUT sometimes it's better to admit how insecure you are, this is like admitting you have a problem. Yano they say the first step to recovery is acceptance. so yeah ACCEPT that you're insecure & instead of being all moppy about it, Do something about so we all can move the fuck on with life already.

Like seriously though, ya gotta do something about it. if you think you're fat, get yo mouth outta that bag of chips, yo spoon outta that tub of B&J's, get yo lazy ass up from that sofa, get the fuck outta your bed & do something about it. go to the gym, go running or hell just put that bag of chips/tub or icecream back to it's chamber, close its door, lock it & throw away the goddamn key. cos yano sitting there & just stuffing yo face ain't got make you feel any less fat, on the contre, it gon make you feel & look worst hun.

If you feel ugly, don't. cos honeslty, there's nothing you can do (if you're in the right mind) to change that face. there are so many ways to enhance parts of a person without surgery, like using make up to make you look better(now don't be going all 'ewww, make up is no unnatural' cos if that's the way you think, don't bother being insecure, or just go spend a few thousands on a new nose or plumper lips, cos i really couldn't give 2 fucks about snob peeps like you), wearing clothes that hide or flatter the different parts of your body. Plus c'mon personality is so much more important than looks.

& then there's the kind of people you hang out with. if you're surrounded with skinny ass bijs that make you feel horrible about your body, then why subject yourslef to that kind of torture when you can be happier with other friends.

Not be the reason why you stop believing in yourself.

Also, If some guys say stuff to you like 'eh why you so fat?' 'cb your thight fucking big sia' , firstly, if you're composed & all, simply smile it off & be like, if they're so unsightly, don't fucking look at them. secondly, if he's like your friend. smile it off & be like 'FRIENDSHIP OVER' cos honestly hun, you don't need friends that make you feel like shit.

Surround yourself with people that make you feel good. Lastly, if he's like your boyfriend or some douche, again, smile it off, then simply take a second to get a good aim & either slap his face so hard his head spins, or simply kick him where it hurts. literally. Ha. cos they kinda deserve it.

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If you're a guy or girl & you're readin this now, you need to know how much one simple "eh you damn fat sia" can do to a person. she can take it so seriously that it may be too much for her to handle. & this is already considered bullying. Did ya know that demi lovato is a victim of this verbal abuse & after several eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia, many cuts on her wrists it eventually landed her in rehab? Yeah & in some extreme case, result in suicide, which is fucked up on so many levels. i mean would you be able to live with the fact that you passing a casual comment just cost someone their life? would you? i highly doubt it, if you can, then you seriously deserve to go to hell.

So the next time you wanna fucking pass a demoralizing comment on some person which you know could potentially hurt them, SAVE IT. they don't need to hear your bullshit cos they already know & they already hate themself enough for it.

So i just wanna end this saying, yes, to a lot of people, appearance is very important. But as cliché as this sounds, it's what's inside that counts.

You're beautiful, don't let anyone ever let you think or feel otherwise, I love you x.

Oh & listen to this, cos every time i feel a lil fucked up or ugly, i just listen to this & instantly feel a bit better. It makes me feel okay with how i am & helps me accept myself as i am & gives me a lil hope that maybe i'll find someone who'll accept me for me too.